"A Sacred Space for a Busy Life"

The title of this post is St. Paul's tagline on their newcomer cards.  I thought it was fitting in this day and age.

This morning, we continued our exploration of area Episcopal Churches at St. Paul's Episcopal Church where a seminarian is doing his field ed.  The parish is located in San Rafael which is across the bay from Berkeley and about 5 miles from the infamous maximum security San Quentin Prison.

We had a hard time finding the church because my GPS took us to the wrong road but once we found it, the bigger issue was finding a place to park.  Unlike more suburban parishes, this church had a very small parking lot that was completely full when we arrived.  If it wouldn't have been that Steve was there and we had driven 30 minutes to get there, we might have left and gone elsewhere but after searching we found a parking spot about 2 blocks away and walked.

The church campus is rather large with a 2 story primary school attached to the parish hall so buildings form a U shape with a nice courtyard on the middle.  The parish is in the process of building a memorial garden so the courtyard was full of construction material but one could imagine what it would be like on a nice sunny day.  Since we were running late because of the parking issue, the service began almost immediately as soon as we sat down.

The first thing that got my attention inside the beauty of the building.  The entire inside of the building, from floor to ceiling was dark wood.  There was a very simple but prominent rood screen and the altar was almost up against the back wall.  It looked like someone had done some renovations to pull it off the wall but it was still "way up there"  The stained glass windows were all very bright and each depicted different scenes from the bible.  There is one window in particular that none of us were sure what it depicted.  Please look at it and see if you can decide what story it is telling.

The Priest this morning did something that I haven't seen in a church in a very long time.  He instructed the congregation to open up the "pew" bibles and turn to a story.  Because he was speaking about the old testament, he asked everyone to turn to Exodus 15: 23-25

When they came to Marah, they could not drink the water of Marah because it was bitter. That is why it was called Marah. 24 And the people complained against Moses, saying, “What shall we drink?” 25 He cried out to the Lord; and the Lord showed him a piece of wood; he threw it into the water, and the water became sweet. 

Think about that passage for a moment.  Moses touched an ordinary piece of wood to the water and it became sweet.  The priest asked where has an ordinary piece of wood changed things?   Of course the congregation said, the cross.  The priest then asked a final question for this specific reading. In the bitter times of our lives, how would that be transformed if touched by the wood of the cross?

After church, we took some time to walk around and look at the building and we all were amazed at the rose window in the back of the church.  You see, most rose windows that we had seen consisted of reds, blues and purples, mainly darker colors.  The most prevalent color in this window was green.   No one could answer why that was.  But we were told the history of the church.  The church was built in 1868 and was originally located in another part of town.  In 1927, the building was scheduled to be torn down and  the powers that be said no, and had an ordinance passed that allowed them to move the building to its present location. The story goes that the building was broken into three pieces, and put on horse drawn carriages and moved in the middle of the night.

The rose window came about as a bet during a poker game.  It is said that during a poker game, a business man ran of funds and asked for a loan to keep playing.  Someone offered him money and that if he lost, he would have to purchase the rose window and have it installed.  The window is there so apparently he lost.

Looking toward the back of the church

Rose Window with Lamb as center

Here are some other pictures from this morning:

The altar

The cross on the Rood Screen

One of the stained glass windows

Another window

Another window

St Gregory's of Nyssa Episcopal Church

As with previous Sundays, this morning five of us decided to visit another notable church in the San Francisco area.  Today we chose St Gregory's of Nyssa.  For those of you who aren't familiar with this church, it is a relatively new church having only built their worship space in 1995.  The worship space is designed specifically for dancing and unaccompanied singing.  We arrived early and walked around the worship space, taking in all the brightly colored icons painted on the walls.

In total there are 89 "dancing" saints painted on the walls.  The largest is Jesus, the Lord of the Dance.  All of the saints have gold halo's except 1 which is Desmond Tutu.  The icons repainted in the walls of the rotunda which is also where the altar is.  

The service on any Sunday is a service in motion.  The service begin in the rotunda with the opening hymn and collect.  Then the congregation "dances" into the seated space (pictured below)

In this section of the worship space, the liturgy of the word takes place.  Today was special because there was a set of twins being baptized.  When it was time for the baptism, the entire congregation danced outside to the baptismal font (pictured below).

baptismal font

After the baptism, we walked into the rotunda, where once again, we started a liturgical dance.  The priest then began the Holy Eucharist.  Once the elements were consecrated, the priests walked through the congregation offering the host.  Then all members of the congregation passed the cup among each other.  The final piece of the service was once again a liturgical dance around the altar.


Once the service was completed, the altar was cleared of liturgical items and the entire rotunda was turned into coffee hour where the altar served as the table.

The altar during coffee hour

I have to say that St. Gregory's is a welcoming community.  When you first walk in, you are required to put a name tag on.  The color of the ink tells "regulars" whether you have attended before or not.  If you haven't people are quick to come over and explain how the service is going to take place and what to expect.

The presider's chair

Looking into the rotunda from the seating area.  The lectern is in the center of the photo

Wild Freedom

I received this from The Church of Our Savior in Washington, D.C. in their inward/outward reflection and I think it is very fitting.



Wild Freedom
Roy Howard

Liminal space is disorienting and disturbing because you are not fully in control. This is true faith and it can be frightening. Yet whenever you risk following Christ's call, astonishing things occur. We know the One who calls is the one who saves. The life of faith means at least this: living in liminal space--cultivating the capacity of heart to hear Christ's invitation and stepping out of comfortable, yet unsatisfying structures toward a future that only God knows. Once we grasp that Peter did not drown and neither will we, then a wild freedom begins.

Source: Living in Liminality (Sermon August 14 2011)

One of my biggest concerns when I started my discernment process was how was I ever going to get back into the student mindset again.  After all I haven't been a full-time or even part time student since I completed my undergraduate degree in 1993.  I have now have completed almost 2 weeks of classes and I can say that I really am enjoying it.  All my classes are interesting, thought provoking and challenging.  Each of my classes challenge me in different ways.
Fundamentals of Worship is a class where all incoming students learn the way that the CDSP chapel operates as well as learning the different offices contained within the Book of Common Prayer.  Unfortunately, here at CDSP, Tuesday's daily office is either sung or chanted so I have to learn how to chant and sing each service.
In History of Christianity, I have to read primary source materials and try to understand not only what the person is saying but also what the text is saying to me.  I really enjoy history but this class scares me.  This class isn't about learning history, it is about learning how to think critically about a text.  I have read my classmates posts about what we are reading and I think I must be reading something different then they are because I just don't see it in the text.  I am continuing to work to understand and hope it comes to me soon.  I started my study of Greek last night, and thank goodness for fraternities in college because I have some knowledge of the Greek alphabet.  Unfortunately, I didn't learn the lowercase Greek letters which I now need to know.
In my Introduction to Old Testament, I am refreshing my memory on the Documentary Hypothesis (the idea that the old testament has four distinct sources) as well as learning about Biblical Exegesis.  I can say that I really enjoy that class, the three hours fly by.
The final class is Anglican Tradition and Life.  This is a class that is lively, engaging and the professor is just an encyclopedia of knowledge.  When he lectures, you can see the enjoyment he is getting and it is contagious.
Of course, the term has just begun and the hard work is still to come.  My first one page reflection paper is due on Friday morning and I have struggled to put my ideas down on paper.  It really shouldn't be hard since the topic what is the relevance of studying Christian history have for my learning goals in your academic program?  I have now written the paper five times and I still am mot sure if I like it or not. The paper isn't even graded.  It is merely to show what our thought process is and to see how well we write.  I need to get past this block because after this week, I have a paper, of at least four pages, due every week for the next eight weeks.
Besides writing papers, I am expected to read about 75 - 100 pages per class per week.  As you can imagine that adds up to lots of time reading texts.  As with any assignment, sometimes I understand the material and sometimes I don't.  What is wonderful about living in community is that we understand what each other are going through and we are there for each other.  The first year students spend a lot of time together talking about our classes and helping each other work out the areas that we are struggling.

Of course, seminary isn't all about classwork.  I also spend a great deal of time in worship and prayer.  Yesterday for example, I was present at four different services.  I began the day with morning prayer at 7:30,  followed by a noon day Eucharist, a 5:30 p.m. evening prayer for the the Eve of the Feast of the Holy Cross and then ended the day at 9:15 with Compline.  It is hard to have a really bad day when you begin and end your day in thanksgiving to God for all the blessing of this life.  Now that is not my normal worship schedule but yesterday was special as a friend was giving her Senior Sermon and I wanted to hear what she was going to say.  Typically I try and attend two of the services during the day.

Well it is about time to head to morning prayer (today it is in Spanish)  so I must say goodbye.

First Year Class Retreat

In an effort to help build community among each class at CDSP, the Dean of Students and a few faculty members take a class on a retreat each year.  This past weekend was our retreat.  The retreat takes place at St. Dorothy's Rest, a diocesan youth camp and retreat center.  The location is a closely guarded secret since it is a complete mystery how we all got there safely.  No GPS unit or cell phone works because of the density and height of the redwood forrest that you drive through during the last part of the trip.  Once I arrived I was in awe at the beauty of the trees, the rustic simplicity of the chapel and buildings and the shear silence of the forrest.  It was God's country.  

Friday night and Saturday morning were times for each of us to get to know each other better and to reflect on how we want to spend our time here at CDSP.  The Dean of Students, Anne, is a great facilitator of groups and she had a few exercise that we did using Appreciative Inquiry, AI, a process I am familiar with from my EFM trainings as well as something I wasn't as familiar with called World Cafe.  Both processes were periods of time where we all shared our past experiences as well as looked to the future.  Since today was Sept 11, Mark Richardson, the President of CDSP led us in a conversation to look back at our own actions in the days following the attacks and particularly looking at those learning points that we want to ensure we remember for the future.  

On Saturday afternoon, we had free time to go explore the area including the California Coast.  We learned that the final scene of Goonies was filmed at a nearby beach so the majority of us all headed ten miles west to the Pacific Ocean and Goat Rock Beach.  One of the other seminarians actually went swimming in the ocean.  

The final piece of business for the retreat was the election of class officers.  A process we all thought would be quick, ended up taking us almost 3 hours to complete.  Finally by consensus, we elected our class president and our member of the worship committee.  It was then time to enjoy compline and social time around a campfire.  

This weekend was a great relaxing break from the first week of classes but the work still needs to be done and tomorrow Greek begins so I must say good night for now.

St Dorothy's Rest website

 

Come Holy Spirit, Come!

This evening was the Opening Convocation, or "The Holy Spirit Eucharist"  at CDSP.  According to the service bulletin, "The Holy Spirit Eucharist at CDSP is our annual communal service asking for the guidance and "infusion" of the Holy Spirit on the academic year.  This is an adaptation of the medieval university tradition of asking for the spirit's guidance on the academic year that lives on in the "red mass" tradition in many law and medical schools, for the beginning of the new legal year in Washington, D.C. as well as throughout Europe."

Linda Clader, the academic dean, gave the sermon and it was definitely fitting.  In it, she asked whether we really knew what we were asking for?  Do we really want to invite the Holy Spirit into our midst?  As Linda put it, you never really know what the Holy Spirit will do.  In fact, she even referenced Psalm 139, when the writer asks in verse 7, "Where can I go from your spirit?  Or where can I flee from your presence?"  She inferred that even the psalmist needed to get away from the Spirit and here we were inviting the Spirit in.

As I reflect on my own journey and the path I am on today, I see how the Spirit has guided me on so many different paths, each time joining with someone else's journey, where we walked together until our path's diverged.  My paths have crossed other's many times so far in my life, and for that I am eternally grateful.  Some of my closest friends walked with me on some very rocky paths, while others have walked through the meadows with me.  As the first week at seminary is coming to a close, I am at the beginning of a new path on my journey.  Where this path is headed or with whom my path will cross, I don't know, but I do know that I am standing here this evening saying,

"Come Holy Spirit, Come"

Peace,

Jay

First Day of Classes

Many people believe that your sub-conscious mind can control how you act and re-act.  I have never been a strong supporter of that belief until now.  You see, today was the first day of classes and so after a very quiet restful weekend, I decided to go to bed early last night, around 10:30.  I figured a good night sleep would be nice before starting classes this morning.  My mind and body had different ideas.  At 12:15, I woke up, wide awake, my head spinning.  It seems that I must have listened to many returning students talking about what it was like as a first year student and how it quickly becomes overwhelming.  I was sitting in bed worrying whether I was really cut out for this school thing.  Did I really make the correct decision to come back to school?  As you can imagine, a million questions, very few positive, were going through my head.  After trying to get to sleep with every technique known to man (okay so I exaggerate a little), I was still wide awake.  The thought then occurred to me that maybe I needed to name my concerns and lift them up in prayer.  After all, I have never walked alone in this process so why would I be alone now.  It seems that naming my fears and concerns allowed me to release their tight fisted grasp on me and finally allowed me to go back to sleep, it was 3:30 a.m. by now.

My first class this morning was Fundamentals of Worship.  It is a 1 credit class that the school recommends you audit.  The course description is:

 "A practical course for students beginning their preparation in liturgical leadership.  The course will walk students through the offices of morning and evening prayer and the Eucharistic liturgy from the perspective of different liturgical roles, attending to issues in public speaking, ritual movement, choices and uses of liturgical music, and comprehension of the shape of the liturgy."

In essence, this class is designed to help us lead the worship here at CDSP as well as allow us to explore many of the other resources available to us other than the Book of Common Prayer and the Hymnal 1982.  CDSP was one of the "testing grounds" for the assessment of the Holy Women, Holy Men Book so it is one of the resources used here.  In total, we were given a list of 10 other Authorized Texts for liturgy and 7 texts for musical resources. I have been to four community services since arriving at CDSP and I have already sung two songs in Spanish and one in an African language.  It is a very eye opening experience.  

My second class of the day today was Introduction to the Old Testament, a three hour lecture based class.  I believe the title is self-explanatory.  This specific class is taught at the Franciscan School of Theology by a Friar.  He is very well educated and loves to speak of the archeological aspect of the Old Testament.  He wants us to explore the concept of critical historical interpretation of the scripture.  In this class over the course of the semester, we are expected to:  write four one page reflection papers on a passage from the old testament that the professor chooses, complete a mid-term and final exam, as well as write a 10 page research paper on a topic that interests us in the Old Testament.  We are required to submit our thesis, outline and partial bibliography to him for approval within the next month.  The final paper is due Nov 15th.  I have already started thinking about possible topics and believe that I am going to write something on the similarities and differences among the call stories of Moses and Noah.  I think.  More to come on that topic later.

Overall, my first day of classes was invigorating and helped to put my mind to ease for the time being.  The professor's that I have encountered all seem to want to help us succeed.  They are willing to go the extra mile to help get us back into the academic mindset.  In reading any class syllabus, you could easily become overwhelmed by the sheer volume of reading and work but if taken week by week, I believe that it will be difficult but not impossible to complete.  

Tomorrow is a seminar that CDSP does every semester call First Wednesday.  It is a time for the entire CDSP community to gather to discuss a topic of importance within the church today.  This year's topic is "Word's Matter."  We are each expected to tell a story about a time in our life where we encountered the significance of words either in a positive or negative manner on our life, beliefs or relationship with God. After sharing in small groups, the gathering is completed with a Community Eucharist Service.  

Well it is getting late and I must try and get some sleep tonight.

Peace,

Jay

Sunday Morning at Grace Cathedral

This morning a group of us decided to drive into San Francisco and attend church at Grace Cathedral, the seat of the Diocese of California.  For those of you not familiar with Grace.  It is the third largest Episcopal Cathedral in North America.  The two larger cathedrals are St John the Divine in New York City and the National Cathedral in Washington D.C.  Grace Cathedral sits on the top of Nob Hill across the street from the Fairmont Hotel.  It is an impressive building from the outside and even more impressive from the inside.  We were not sure how bad traffic was going to be so we decided to leave CDSP at 9:45 a.m. for an 11:00 a.m. church service.  Of course there was no traffic so we arrived at the cathedral parking garage early.  It was nice to arrive early as it gave us time to explore the cathedral before the service.  This cathedral, unlike the National Cathedral or St John the Divine, really had an impact on me.  When I walked inside, I felt as if I had stepped into the Holy. In the background, you could hear the men's choir rehearsing their music for the service.  It was an awe some experience.   I am still processing what was different about this building that caused me to feel this way but it was a very calming effect.  

As I walked around looking at the stained glass and murals, I quickly became aware of the reverence that was shown by everyone in this building.  It was different than I had experienced at the other cathedrals.  It may have been that service was about to begin, but I'm not sure.  

Having never attended a Sunday service at a cathedral, I wasn't sure what to expect.  Promptly at 11:00 am.  the organ began playing Hymn 400, All Creatures of Our God and King.  The procession began from the right side of the altar with a verger, a crucifer, 2 acolytes and the choir, then another verger, the altar assistants and readers, followed by another verger,  the diocesan banner, the thurifer, the deacon, and then the celebrant and presider.  Overall, it was an impressive procession.  

After having attended two different Sunday services in California and also the services here at CDSP in the chapel, I have come to realize that chanting the service is very popular out here.  Chanting, as well as, remembering how to read music are two of the jobs that I am going to have to learn relatively quickly.  

Grace Cathedral as viewed from California St

The view from the courtyard

The main entrance 

Another view of the main entrance

looking toward the front of the church

A mural depicting the great fire

After the service, we walked down the street to Chinatown, had a great lunch and headed back to Berkeley, but not before get a great picture of the Transamerica building.

I will leave you with one last thought as written by The Very Rev. Dr. Jane Shaw, Dean of Grace Cathedral.  This is the welcome printed on the front of every service booklet.  To me her words sum up what we all should be striving for in our churches, whether that church is a large inner city cathedral or a small rural parish. 

"Welcome to Grace Cathedral.  We hope you will glimpse the glory of God here, not only in the beauty of this sacred space but also in the people you meet.  Cathedrals have long been places of pilgrimage and we, a group of believers and seekers, welcome you amongst us and hope you return.

Since its foundation this cathedral has been a house of prayer for all people.  This mean stat whoever you are, and wherever you have come from, this cathedral is for you.  May you find solace here if you need it, and may you know God's generous love.  The message of Jesus is simple: God loves everyone without exception or reservation."

The Fog in Berkeley

San Francisco Bay - Top of the Golden Gate Bridge Towers are slightly visible above the fog

One of the hardest things to get used to around here is the weather.  On a good day, I change my clothes two times on a bad day maybe three or four times.  Today for example started out in the 50's with the fog.  By midday it is in the mid 70's and totally sunny. At dinner time, the fog starts to roll back in and it gets cold again.  Tonight a group of first year's walked down through the Cal campus for dinner.

Cal Berkeley Bell Tower before dinner as the fog rolls back in

Bell Tower after dinner shrouded in fog

Blogging 101 - how to comment

Multiple people have e-mailed me asking how to comment.  Because I have a username, I never thought about it but I did some research this afternoon and am posting the link to an article to help people comment.  I would love to hear comments from people about this.  I want this space to be an open place of dialogue.

Jay


How to comment on a blogger blog?